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More often than not, I found myself struggling to force laughter while watching “Mad Heidi,” a lazy, one-note, crowd funded film from co-directors Johannes Hartmann and Sandro Klopfstein. Billed as a Swissploitation action/horror comedy, I wanted so badly for this movie to be funny, but it just isn’t. Here’s a case where the premise is far better than the finished product, which turns out to be an unfortunate example of what happens when a movie is simply trying too hard to be clever (and fails). Set in a dystopian Switzerland, Heidi (Alice Lucy) and her grandfather live a simple life in the Alps. Their beautiful country has fallen under the fascist rule of an evil cheese tyrant, Our Very Swiss Leader (Casper Van Dien), a ruthless dictator who wants to rule the world through dairy domination. When Heidi’s goat-herding boyfriend (Kel Matsena) is brutally murdered by the government for distributing illegal cheese, she sets out on a revenge tour to find vengeance for her lover. Along the way, she’ll have to fight against super soldiers, prison inmates, ninja nuns, deathly henchmen, and face other outlandish obstacles as she fights to restore freedom to her country. It sounds like a hilarious premise for a midnight movie, and it is. The problem is that this action-adventure story is far too weird, campy, and dumb — and not in a good way. There’s not enough material for a feature length movie (the main concept pitch was probably something like “hey, let’s see all the crazy things we can do with cheese, like torturing people with fondue”), which makes the whole thing reek of desperation. There are lame homages to everything from Tarantino films to exploitation flicks from the 70s and 80s, and none of it works. There are shades of “Sisu” and “Kill Bill,” but with dreadfully unfunny running cheese jokes. The sense of humor is lacking, and I found very little funny about this film. It’s not goofy enough nor quick-witted enough to stand out, and the quartet of writers (Klopfstein and Hartmann, along with Gregory D. Widmer and Trent Haaga) crafted a screenplay that feels disjointed. The writing and dialogue is, and I won’t mince words because there’s no point in doing so, absolutely dreadful. The retro look and feel of the film finds mild success, as do the practical gore effects. It’s bloody and violent with creative kills, but audiences are forced to sit through a painfully slow and plodding first half before the good stuff (aka the revenge-fueled ass kicking) starts. This is a movie you’ll never want to watch again, which means it has little chance of ever becoming the cult classic is so desperately wants to be. Movies need to start with a solid foundation and go from there, but “Mad Heidi” seems to work backwards by building its thin story around a final punchline. As a result, this second-rate film feels like nothing more than an unfunny, fatigued gimmick.
The Grim Reaper, who runs a bookie shop in the afterlife, resurrects three recently deceased zombies to help him recover his own debt losses and gain revenge on those who killed them.
In this outrageous sequel to Garra de tigre / “Tiger Claw” (1985), martial artist Ruben Gonzáles returns to battle a killer bear, a necrophile psycho and zombies.
Containing gore, snuff movies, zombies, the Mafia and the supernatural, this was one of the most notorious "solo para adultos" direct-to-video releases in Mexico during the 90s.
A young man tries to get away from his disfunctional family by working with his friend, a rich boy who lives in excess and sleaze, but he will soon realize how reckless his friend is and that he is submerged in a life of crime, vice and deadly bets.
After the owner of a failing drive-in restaurant sells his establishment, two waitresses and a French chef try to turn it around.
James Bond tracks his archnemesis, Ernst Blofeld, to a mountaintop retreat in the Swiss alps where he is training an army of beautiful, lethal women. Along the way, Bond falls for Italian contessa Tracy Draco, and marries her in order to get closer to Blofeld.
Shaun lives a supremely uneventful life, which revolves around his girlfriend, his mother, and, above all, his local pub. This gentle routine is threatened when the dead return to life and make strenuous attempts to snack on ordinary Londoners.
When a Sumatran rat-monkey bites Lionel Cosgrove's mother, she's transformed into a zombie and begins killing (and transforming) the entire town while Lionel races to keep things under control.
In 1979, a group of college students find a Sumerian Book of the Dead in an old wilderness cabin they've rented for a weekend getaway.
Ash, a handsome, shotgun-toting, chainsaw-armed department store clerk, is time warped backwards into England's Dark Ages, where he romances a beauty and faces legions of the undead.
Austin's hottest DJ, Jungle Julia, sets out into the night to unwind with her two friends Shanna and Arlene. Covertly tracking their moves is Stuntman Mike, a scarred rebel leering from behind the wheel of his muscle car, revving just feet away.