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The One Show - (Mar 29th)
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According to IMDb, it took five people to write this movie; judging from the result – a series of unrelated vignettes characterized by half-baked ideas that set up a situation only to immediately drop it –, each wrote their contribution incommunicado from the other four. We have an adman whose client, played by Jon Lovitz, apparently owns a jetpack company; never mind that jet packs have very few practical and no recreational uses. We also have a woman who designs dog clothing, and puts on a fashion show in her apartment living room for a pet store clerk, a broad dressed as Catwoman (who announces her intention to go to the bathroom by asking where the litter box is), and, for some reason, a Catholic priest, all while her roommate has a loud threesome with two guys wearing the uniform of the Argentine national soccer team. This will be the last time we ever hear about jet packs or doggy fashion, which is probably for the best. These two individuals meet, and he asks her out; she replies that she has decided to abstain from dating until she has completed her first business transaction (it occurs to me that, were she a prostitute, she could kill two birds with one stone; crude, yes, but still funnier than anything in this movie, which settles on crude, period). Why make her say this, when the very next scene shows them already engaged? Of course, the reason the film doesn't bother with the characters' courtship is because it can't wait to get to Jamaica and quote-unquote delight us with frontal nudity, references to marijuana use, and scatological humor. Consider this: a group of characters go sailing on a boat, and one of them regales the rest with tales of horny dolphins. Another character falls overboard and is surrounded by dolphins that are as anatomically correct as a CGI dolphin can be – which is not much, but the point is that we can clearly see why these animals are mammals and not fish. A third character dives to the rescue, and... nothing. The movie cuts to the next scene and that's it. We never know if the character is molested by dolphins (once again, that's probably for the better). Here's another example: a character runs into a blonde who, to his surprise, invites him to her hotel room; he gets over his astonishment, they leave together and…nothing. They walk off the frame, the movie cuts to another scene, and that's it. And so on and so forth. The movie leaves a plethora of loose ends, but the biggest question is, what the hell is Luke Wilson doing in this unholy mess? Did the producers kidnap Owen and held him hostage, and Luke appearing in this debacle was the ransom? I mean, Jon Lovitz I can understand, but Luke Wilson? WTF?
A man and a woman come from two very different cultural backgrounds, and decide that they won't get married until they convince their parents. As feared, differences between the families pose a hurdle.
C.R. MacNamara is a managing director for Coca Cola in West Berlin during the Cold War, just before the Wall is put up. When Scarlett, the rebellious daughter of his boss, comes to West Berlin, MacNamara has to look after her, but this turns out to be a difficult task when she reveals to be married to a communist.
Matti and Niila, growing up in the mid-sixties in the harsh and conservative environment of a Finnish-speaking part of Tornedalen in Swedish Laponia, close to the Finnish border. Their big dream is to become rock stars. In the present the now grown-up Matti feels guilt for the death of his drug-addicted rock star friend Niila.
The young Bavarian princess Elisabeth, who all call Sissi, goes with her mother and older sister Néné to Austria where Néné will be wed to an emperor named Franz Joseph, Yet unexpectedly Franz runs into Sissi while out fishing and they fall in love.
As the romantic monsoon rains loom, the extended Verma family reunites from around the globe for a last-minute arranged marriage in New Delhi. This film traces five intersecting stories, each navigating different aspects of love as they cross boundaries of class, continent and morality.
Ana Paula catches her fiancé cheating. After a night of drinking, she wakes up far from home, not so certain she wants to go back.
Doug Harris is a loveable but socially awkward groom-to-be with a problem: he has no best man. With less than two weeks to go until he marries the girl of his dreams, Doug is referred to Jimmy Callahan, owner and CEO of Best Man, Inc., a company that provides flattering best men for socially challenged guys in need. What ensues is a hilarious wedding charade as they try to pull off the big con, and an unexpected budding bromance between Doug and his fake best man Jimmy.
Greg Focker is ready to marry his girlfriend, Pam, but before he pops the question, he must win over her formidable father, humorless former CIA agent Jack Byrnes, at the wedding of Pam's sister. As Greg bends over backward to make a good impression, his visit to the Byrnes home turns into a hilarious series of disasters, and everything that can go wrong does, all under Jack's critical, hawklike gaze.
Ben Holmes, a professional book-jacket blurbologist, is trying to get to Savannah for his wedding. He just barely catches the last plane, but a seagull flies into the engine as the plane is taking off. All later flights are cancelled because of an approaching hurricane, so he is forced to hitch a ride in a Geo Metro with an attractive but eccentric woman named Sara.
On the eve of his 25th birthday, the day he’s set to receive money from his trust fund, Rocco parties, gets drunk and loses all his money on a poker match. His dilemma: He has to produce the amount, otherwise he will lose the client he needs to defeat his father’s TV commercial production company. Meanwhile, Rocky also needs money to pay the rent, otherwise her family will be homeless. There’s only one way for Rocco to be able to get money from his trust fund: Fulfill the conditions set by his grandmother and that is to get married. Rocky agrees to act as Rocco’s pseudo wife in exchange for a “talent fee.” They seal the deal. As they live like a married couple, Rocco and Rocky face one problem after another, forcing them with no alternative but to reconcile their differences and work with each other. Complication arises when they start to feel for each other, with their bond getting closer.
After keeping a careful distance for many years, 25-year-old Gaspard must renew contact with his family when his father remarries. Accompanied by Laura, an eccentric young woman who agrees to pretend she's his girlfriend at the wedding, he finally feels ready to set foot in the zoo owned by his parents, where he is reunited with the monkeys and tigers he grew up with... But with a father who is an out-of-control womanizer, a brother who is far too sensible, and a sister who is far too beautiful, he unknowingly sets himself up to experience the last days of his childhood.